Thoughts in the mind of l0oree

Archive for June, 2012

Roads Lived ON and a Friend Dearly Missed


Earlier this year I was searching information on a Highway that I lived on during my childhood sexual abuse year.  It was a clay gravel road with one way bridges for awhile then paved.  So many potholes on the road our school bus rattled every bolt loose.  Whenever it rained the school bus had to go an alternate route through logging roads 30 miles out of the way to get us to school by 2nd period.   I lived halfway between Sheridan and Redfield on this gravel road.   On a little gravel road called Qualls Rd.  There was a trail from the neighbors yard through the woods to take a shortcut for the bus stop.  This was a relief during winter days due to only time used because of ticks so bad.  Although I found myself running down the trail a few times to get to the bus on time during warm weather.  The day at school was spent picking c-ticks off my skin.  Once walking this trail while carrying my Arkansas History book a bird crapped on the book.   Behind this house back then where this trail was- was a pastuer with black cows.  My friend Kim Harris lived there.  I remember wearing red shirt and running from the cows across the wooden steps built across the fence.  Kim had all kinds of animals at her house including peacocks.  There was a big ladder platform with a handlebar swing that everyone played.  I moved from here during the summer after 8th grade. I moved to Watson Chapel on Cross Road.   After highschool, I met Kim again.  We became close friends again. She drove a little blue car and we sang and sang everywhere we went.  She was a little songbird.  She continued to live at the same location but was changed some now the trail that I walked to catch the bus on was her driveway.  I thought that was very cool.  No more catching ticks through the pine thicket trail.  While I was researching I discovered her trajic death.  She was murdered. I miss her. I am just now able to sing in my car again without crying. 


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Update: Double shooting in Grant County

Reported by: David Goins
Updated: 12/08/2010 8:51 pm Published: 12/03/2010 10:53 am
Grant County, AR – A simple 911 hang up call brought deputies to the house at 8227 Highway 46 east of Sheridan just after 8:00 Friday morning.  But when they arrived they found a gruesome scene — two people shot in the head.
“Something like this isn’t supposed to happen.”
That’s what the Sheriff is saying about the gruesome double shooting in Grant County.
Detectives are working leads right now at the Grant County Sheriff’s Office. But this is a double shooting with whole lot more questions than answers.
“Right at this point we’re kind of at a loss as to why this occurred,” Sheppard says.
Sheriff Robert Sheppard says Garry Harris died in the home.  His daughter, 38-year-old Kimberly Tiger, was taken to Baptist Hospital in Little Rock. Initial reports stated she had died in transit but it now appears she may be on life support.
Detectives have few solid leads.  There are no signs of struggle or forced entry and nothing was taken.
As word quickly spread about the shooting, family members arrived at the quiet Grant County home.
The Sheriff says he doesn’t know why the father and daughter were targeted.
“Mr. Harris is the kind of fellow that never has had a problem with anybody, gets along with everyone,” Sheppard says.  “Co-workers know him and know him to be in a close-knit family and polite.  Something like this is not supposed to happen.”
Now detectives are working to find out why it did, and even more important, who’s responsible.
Harris worked for the Pulaski County Road and Bridge Department with his wife. Today was his day off; his wife was at work when the shooting happened.
The Sheriff says he doesn’t know if the victims were targeted or if the shootings were random.
Even without that information, the Sheriff adds he doesn’t have concern for the neighborhood about possible additional attacks.
Copyright 2010 Newport Television LLC All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
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The views expressed here do not necessarily represent those of FOX16 – Breaking News and Weather to Plan Your Day for  Little Rock and Central Arkansas

golfdude – 12/6/2010 7:57 AM
1 Vote
Thanks Shameless, as anyone knows, we like to throw punches on here as much as anyone, but not when it comes to cold hearted murder.

shameless – 12/4/2010 2:33 PM
2 Votes
TO majique:—May you NEVER have to face the trials and trivlations this family is now facing. But if and when you do may others have more mercy for your pain than to make wise cracks as to the location rather than the impact this will have on you, your family and friends. I feel for fools such as you….the location of the town city county directions anything matter….like bambi’s mom said to him when he was laughing at thumper—IF YOU CANT SAY SOMETHING NICE—-THEN SAY NOTHING AT ALL….THIS IS THE TIME TO MOURN WITH THE FAMILY OR STFU AND SAY NADDA..WHY SHOW YOUR IGNORANCE???? I guess it was your home raising. But around these parts it makes little difference if you are friend or foe—-this is a tragidy taht should NEVER happen to anyone even ignorant a*(*&( like you.

shameless – 12/4/2010 2:28 PM
2 Votes
omg do we have IDIOTS in here or what. If you cant say anything that is within reason,,,,STFU….this is a tragedy, this girl is she still alive or is it complete life support? Either way the family has several hard and very painful decissions to make. I have had to make these same decissions just a few years ago myself. I have a suggestion to make tho I hope it is not out of turn or I get razzed but the truth is some people dont know or dont think about it. (1) please if it is the higher powers will that this young lady passes, please consider donating her organs so that she may live on while helping another which seems to be this familys greatest strength. (2) social security benefits will cover like 155 bucks of final expenses. I know that sounds futile at this point and I swear I mean no harm but it will come in handy as I know the expeses of enternment. Peace be with you the family and friends, pull together with friends and loved ones in this you darkest hour. I wish I could offer an explanation for this tragedy but as with my own situation, I can not. I can only offer encouragment and sympathy and tell you although it seems impossible at this state time heals but leaves a jagged scar. May you find comfort in your higher power and may it guide you and give you the answers you seek. Angels to you and yours.

countryboy – 12/4/2010 5:55 AM
4 Votes
majique—-you need a punch in the mouth!!! i’ll gladly give it to you!! there is a time to be funny and a time not to be. guess which time this is? two people died show a little compassion for them and their family!! it doesn’t matter if sheridan is in grant county or grant county is in sheridan. what does matter is prayers are needed!!! this family has mine!! so does simple minded people!!

countryboy – 12/4/2010 5:45 AM
4 Votes
majique—— you need a punch in the mouth to learn you some respect!! i’ll gladly give it to you!!! there is a time to be funny and a time not to be. do you have brains enough to figure out what time this is? probaly not!

guardian1 – 12/4/2010 1:47 AM
2 Votes
I worked alongside with Garry,i really don’t understand why someone would do something like this to such loving people.Me and my Family’s Heart goes out to the Harris Family.

trophygirl – 12/3/2010 8:00 PM
2 Votes
My heart and soul goes out to the family. Yes, others are right, Grant County in Sheridan, Arkansas is a close nit family town. Rarely do we ever see such here. Our little town has a huge heart! I pray for healing of the families and strength to deal with this…God Bless Glenda Jackson McFarland

HogsCall – 12/3/2010 7:48 PM
2 Votes
So sad, prayers for family and friends.

greeneyes12345 – 12/3/2010 7:45 PM
2 Votes
Praying for the Harris family. Praying they catch the monster or monsters that did this! This is scary that something like this can happen in our community!

angel50music – 12/3/2010 7:23 PM
2 Votes
The Harris’s were friendly, quiet, Christian folks.  I have known them several years.  This is a tragedy and a waste of human life.  My heart and prayers go out to Mrs. Harris and the rest of the family.  I live in Sheridan, which, for the most part, is a quiet town with a community feel.  Things like this just don’t happen here!
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Therapy Interupted by Clouds


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  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 22, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • country boy can survive looking for owls on a dark gravel road?  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 22, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • how did you get my post without being on my friends list?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 22, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • just wondering

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 22, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • smartest kid in the class.  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 30, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Hi this is Lori. You can call me please. My computer lost signal again. 9037807393

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 30, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Hi Lori,       It was nice meeting you and talking to you.  I wrote you on Liveperson, since you were having so many problems with your computer, if I could give you feedback based on what we were able to cover?  I’m glad to meet with you again of course, but if it’s stormy or rainy, telephone would be preferrable.       Unfortunately, according to Liveperson’s Terms of Service, I’m not allowed to call anyone off the system, but it does have a feature where you can call me on the system, if you’d like to try that instead of the computer in the future.  Please let me know.  Take good care.                                                          Ernest Wahrburg, LCSW.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 30, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • thanks feedback would be nice. Thank you for your concern, patience, and nice talking to you.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 30, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Lori:       Would you prefer to receive the feedback here on FB or back on Liveperson? Thanks, Ernest Wahrburg, LCSW.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 30, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Either way is ok but i can get to Fb on my phone. So Fb would be better for me.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 30, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok Lori, FB it is.  Plan to get it done not later than tomorrow morning.  Take good care.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 30, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok Lori,       Here goes some feedback, but please understand that I didn’t really get as far as I would have wanted to today, partly because of the computer problems, so some of my statements could be pre-mature, so please don’t take “anything to heart” at this point.       Based on our meeting today, I would say that your diagnosis is: Major depressive disorder, recurrent, moderate.
      However, you did mention a history of bipolar disorder and hypomania and I didn’t get a chance to explore that, so I will plan to do so if you’d like to meet again, and your “diagnosis” is certainly subject to some revision.       It’s clear that you had a profoundly difficult childhood.  From being adopted in infanthood, to having abusive parents, to being molested at the tender age of 7 for one year, to having an emotionally abusive mother.  All of these things, no doubt, take their emotional toll.  They would with anyone.  I actually feel a lot of admiration for your resiliency and ability to have survived thru all of that.  Further, youi not only survived, but you got yourself educated – you’re a healthcare professional, you’ve raised 2 children who sound like they’re doing well in life, you’ve done this as a single parent, you’re a productive member of society who’s managed not to get caught up in etoh or drug abuse despite the major adversities you’ve been thru, so I have admiration for you, in that respect as well.       Regarding your sleep, you seem to have initial insomnia, and I think you should seriously consider seeing a doctor to get a sleep aid, to help you get over that.  It could be possible, that your excessive sleep at times, might possibly be related to the initial insomnia, your body trying to catch up on that lost sleep, so there are possible additional benefits besides not struggling to get to sleep.       At 5ft 2in. and 180 lbs., I would agree with you that dieting and exercising are important and could be very beneficial to you.  Exercising, I’m sure you know is well documented to be helpful with depression, even on a chemical level by stimulating the production of the brain’s natural anti-depressant medication.  I’m a bit concerned about being awakened to urinate twice nightly.  I understand that you’ve had a lot of improvement in that area, but you’ve also been off of Risperdal x 4 yrs., so it’s difficult to see how that could be directly involved.  I think it’s something you should check out with your physician, for the present, and to try to prevent a potential future problem.       You seem to struggle quite a bit, with getting going on non-work days, getting out of bed, dressed, showered, out of the house, etc.  I think that’s part of the depression and I feel like you need to do some work in overcoming that.  Sleeping 12 hours is generally unhealthy and will tend to perpetuate depression.  Fighting the temptation to sleep that much, getting over the hump, to get out of bed, dressed, groomed and go outside and do something productive, will tend to help you to overcome your depression.  Having 2 children, still at an age where they depend on you, can be used as motivation in helping you to combat this.  In order to be the best mother you can be, you need to be the best person you can be, and anything you can do to diminish your depression, is going to help you to be a better and more productive individual and mother.      Being as future oriented in your thinking, as goal oriented in your behavior as possible are components of combatting depression, just as exercising is.  Doing instead of thinking, socializing instead of isolating are all basic things to do to combat depression.  Having a confidante and not holding in a lot of negative emotions, but sharing them with someone who is trustworthy, will help combat depression.  Being part of a group, like attending religious services with some regularity tends to diminish people’s depression.       The abuse that you endured was heinous.  It seems clear that some “reconstructive work” needs to be done there.  What I mean by that, is that when a child gets abused in a serious and chronic way as you have, there is a tendency to develop certain false beliefs about oneself and certain ways of thinking that are potentially distorted and unhealthy.  A very simple example of something that transpired in our session that I think might actually relate to abuse, was when you asked me early on, something like if I needed to go and tend to someone else who might need some help.  We had exchanged quite a few emails and made an agreement to meet, so that was “your time” and you appeared worried if someone else might be in need.  I think when a child is badly abused, there is a tendency to feel like “you don’t count”.  To feel like, “it’s not my turn yet, I can deal with my stuff, I’m not that important, I can wait, I can cope, etc. versus “claiming your time”, stating your needs, and accepting support and help from others.  It’s somewhat of a big leap from your simple statement/question, but I have a feeling it may be accurate.       Well, I’m going to wrap up for today, but please know that I do welcome feedback about what I’ve said, or about our session, good or bad!  So, please don’t hesitate.  Again, it’s been nice meeting you and getting to know you and if you’d like to have another session or regular sessions, I’m glad to do that.  Please let me know what your current thoughts are on that, and if you desire, we can schedule another meeting.  Hope to talk to you more later. Take Care, Ernest Wahrburg, LCSW.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 30, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Thanks I will make a doctors appointment on Monday. I think you are so right about me tending to put myself last.  I would love some “reconstructive work” 🙂 I am off work until Tuesday. What would be a good time?

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Excellent, thanks for getting back to me.  Glad you plan to make a doctor’s appt.  I work in a group private practice on Mon., Tues., Thurs. and Fri.  If you’d like to move forward soon therefore, today, Sun. would be the best option.  I don’t know what time you’ll wake up and see this message, but when you do, get back to me, and we can plan a time, if you’d like to meet today.  My only question would be how the weather is by you, regarding your computer’s performance.  Take care.  Hope to speak to you later.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Good Morning! I think my computer is better today. Clouds are gone. Two bars instead of one, and I have been on for 10 minutes so far without disruption. Meeting today would be great!

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, good to hear!  What time would be good for you?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • @2, 3 your time?

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • ok, so 3PM EST?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • yes

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, would the same fee for 60min. be alright, not too stressful for you?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • yes would be fine. But this would have to be my last one until next payday. February 12

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • well, so as not to have such a big lapse, I’d be glad to halve the fee, if that helps, or even throw in a session gratis, or do email exchange.  I’m happy to work with you.  :o)

    • For today, do u have a specific topic you’d like to discuss?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I would like to discuss coping mechanisms as an adult instead of reverting back to childhood mechanisms. I think that is part of my depression and one thing I did as a child was stay in my room and not ever talk to anyone for like 8 y/o until 17.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, I think in order to discuss that in an effective manner, we would need to explore some of the abuse experiences, to develop an understanding of how those childhood mechanisms developed and why you may be vulnerable to reverting back to them at times.  Would you be comfortable with some discussion of the childhood abuse, with that objective?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I would go in my closet and cry. Because crying or laughing was not allowed by my father. He is german descent. His grandparents  imigrated from Germany.

    • yes I would be comfortable

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Yes, I understand.  I am of German descent as well.  See you later then.  Take care.  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • ty:-)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • things that are positive about me

      I do not drink alcohol. I love my children. They are my most precious blessings. I am very smart. I think I am very loved by God. Because he hears and answers my prayers. Even though I am Christian I usually pray directly to God. I am a very good nurse with lots of empathy for my patients. I am blessed with brains to get me through college during very stressful times. I was one of 30 chosen out of 400 applicants for nursing school. The stress I have endured in my life makes my life as a nurse really easier than most because this job that is stressful to most is not that stressful to me. I seem to be able to make a stressful situation calmer. I move fast in life when necessary and slow down when things are acccomplished or like at a pause,for reasons like money, transortation, etc. I call this patience. It is truely a virtue that not many people have. Good things do come to those that wait.  I am a mostly auditory learner. So lisening and understanding come easy to me.  I I love music. . I am a fairly good clarinet playerl

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Oh, ok – thank you, you did that very fast.  That’s a good sign.  Don’t hesitate to add more if you’d like, before we meet again.  It’s been nice working with you.  Hope you have a good week and take care.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I am beautiful on the inside. That beauty shines through to the world. I don’t argue with people. I usually compromise. Everyone is entitled to there own opinion however ridiculous it might seem to me. I don’t have to agree with it I have my own opinions.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I am to the point straight forward. Do not like to waste my time with loosers, ( people that try to drain every thing from you without giving anything back ) I am successful because I am alive against bad odds. The devil must hate me. I see positive things in everyone. I model those positive qualities, Combine them and make them my own. I don’t want to repeat past mistakes so I try to see  what happened in my past so I never go through that again. This way my future is brighter with less falling down. This is the reason history is a class.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Although history was always the one class I never did very good at lol

    • I always liked to watch the current events. History in its present form to make my life better for my generation.

    • The news, tmz, current events that are never talked about in school.  I loved to talk to my Grandma Ruby when she was alive.  She actually lived in the Great Depression.  Had twins told the mid wife after they were born I will pay you 10 dollars instead of 5 dollars. Put the twins in a shoebox to keep them warm. Punched wholes in the shoe box lol so they would not suffacate.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • back to me. I have respect for my elders even though I was so badly abused.  I know there life had to suck really bad to take that out on me. Some things they went through I don’t want to understand. To understand some things you have to live through it and I never want to live through whatever made my parents so weird.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Well, I really am glad to read that you do have many positive feelings about yourself!!  That’s great to see.  One important item that we didn’t get to last time relates to bipolar disorder/hypomania, so let’s plan to do that at the beginning of our next session.  I’d appreciate if you remind me, in case I seem to have forgotten.  Thanks Lori.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Lori, do you ever seem to go thru a period of time, when you can get by on no, or almost no sleep?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Yes

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Have you ever had a period of time where you went on shopping sprees, and have spent money in a manner disproportionate to what you were really able to afford?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • when I am manic I don’t sleep at all. I went like 2 weeks before without sleeping. That was before my hospitalization after lpn school. Then my mom taking away my son did not help much to ease the depression after my manic phase was over.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Yes, your mom sounds very opportunistic and I’m sorry to hear that!

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I am pretty much not a big spender except on my kids

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, that sounds good.  Did u ever go on spending splurges for them, where your spending was disproportionate to what was really realistic for you to spend?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • when I started Rn nursing school. I was neg 400 dollars in my account I worked and paid my own way through  one semester at a time

    • while liveing in a one bedroom efficiency apartment all bill paid.

    • rent 450 a month

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Have you ever felt like you were involved in so many different projects, so extremely busy, that you had so many balls in the air, that it was difficult to juggle them all without dropping any of the balls?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • that included lights, water and gas and local phone and cable

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • ok, that really doesn’t sound like a problem, just typical financial stresses during youthful years of education.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • no but I have taken like 5 showers a day . one day seemed like a year.

    • yes I am wondering when finacial stress ever ends?

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • you took five showers a day, for some prolonged time period?  What was making you feel the need to do that?

    • lol, yeah, in today’s economy, I think we all are.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • to keep my self healthy while being awake becasuse I was moving because I gave my landlord only half the rent so I could afford toliet paper. and I came home from work to my door being taken off its hinges. with a note saying if I want my door back pay me my rent

    • then another note saying do I need to take your door off again?

    • so I was moving putting my stuff in my car and moving it to my friends grandfather’s back house.

    • I made the mistake of calling my mom and leaving a detailed budget on her answering machine because she woudl not answer the phone

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Wow, that’s some way of operating as a landord!  That took a lot of nerve!  Did you have an ongoing problem with this landlord?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • she showed up at my house saying “get the behind me satan”  I pushed her out the door and locked it.

    • I did not need the extra stress

    • yeah I went and stayed at a friend’s house. The lanlord then left a eviction letter on the door

    • I called up the landlord said I am not breaking the lease you are the one breaking the lease I will stay and pay you your money. He then said I could move without paying the lease

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Wow, he sounds very unprofessional!

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • lol then my mom came and got me in her car. Was taking me to where she lives. Me telling her no I have to work next day was working in dialysis still in training. so when we got to a red light I reached to open the door to get out. My sister in back seat caught the door. Parents pulled up in liquor store parking lot to buy coke while sister called paramedics to come get me

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • In terms of feeling totally overwhelmed with projects, tasks and ideas, did u ever feel like you had so many balls in the air, that it was difficult to maintain your pace without dropping some of the balls?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • they told them I tried to jump out the van. Took me to er. er doctor said I could go home with someone staying with me. So my parents took me home left my sister there. I was up all night packing. I woke her up to ask to use her cell phone to call my friend. She called the police on me

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • then I went to jail. cuz when the police got there I slapped her when I realized she called them cuz I was trying to tell the cop to get her out of my house.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • You slapped your mom?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I stayed in jail til monday they took me to er then to psychiatric hospital. then I was served with papers with my mom having custody of my son

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I slapped my sister in my own yard and went to jail for that

    • the judge nol pros though by request of the officer

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • have u ever had any difficulty with being physically assaultive of others?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • no but that was uncalled for her to call the police over me just asking to borrow her cell phone to call a friend she could of just said no and went back to bed

    • lmao my sister 5′ 11 german blood. That was very brave of me at 5’2 only 120 lbs then

    • I was hypomanic at the time that was my diagnosis at the hospital

    • I would probably never be that brave again in my life

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Have u ever had a period of time where u felt like your behavior was wreckless, overly risky, promiscuous, where u drove extremely fast or engaged in any other potentially dangerous activities for a prolonged time period?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I was in the hospital for 2 weeks my boss was so sweet she gave me my sick leave and vacation pay never missed a pay check

    • I was permiscuous once led to me having my first baby. So good things do happen by accident she is living proof.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • sorry, I didn’t follow, what did you feel so brave about?

    • Yes, they do.  But you never had a period of time when you felt that you acted in a promiscuous manner?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Her dad I met at a party told him he was the cutest guy I have ever seen and you are taking me home tonight. We had sex. We dated after that for about 3 months he moved in with me. He had trust issues naturally because of how we met. So one day I come home from a workout at the gym. He is not there. I go to sleep wake up and he is in the living room sleeping with another girl. I kick him out go to the clinic to make sure he did not give me a disease. Find out I am pregnant. That was my 21st birthday. My best friend gave me the dollar for the check up for a bithday gift.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I felt brave because my sister is very mean. She shows her anger toward others very mean. I saw her drop kick her puppy once all the way across the yard. And she used to tell me you better move. When she says that you better cuz she will hit the first thing in sight.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Omg, so you actually caught him in the act and managed not to freak out and kept your cool?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Ya I just told him to get out.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • This is a pretty nifty way of communicating, huh?  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Then found out that afternoon i was pregnant with his baby

    • Ya

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • I’m so sorry that you’ve been treated so abusively by men, and by women too, for that matter.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • and she so tall. all my family is tall the only one shorter than me in everyone in the family is my 12 y/o son. even my 15 y/o nephew is like 6’2 inches tall

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    January 31, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Have you been feeling especially “charged up” tonight?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • not really. just exiciting someone I can talk to about this crazy life. Helps me sort through my actions and thoughts and seeming to be normal. I have never had anyone to really talki too.

    • no one understands this much craziness.  My life is like the movie jumanji. One crazy thing after another. I want a stop to the craziness and peace and happiness.

    • Sharing my past has something to do with fixing that I would talk till it transpired because that is how much I want that.

    • another good quality about me I am determined. I finish what I start. Might be a little late, might be not as good as I planned, might be obstacles in the way but I always find a way to get through them.

    • I have a childlike heart. I don’t like to learn the hard way. I like to read the directions and look stuff up in the dictionary when I don’t know.

    • I love babies I know they understand way more than they tell you.

    • I believe life is what you make it. You can be happy with yourself no matter what anyone else thinks. Through troubled times you can get inner strength from thinking good things about yourself. Like I told you about me staying in my room. I would always exercise. Listen to music, write my thoughts in a journal, fix my hair and makeup till I knew I was pretty in the mirror. Did not matter to me what my mom thought. She would say I”m ” ugly, stupid, liar, going to hell, crazy, lazy, good for nothing”  I would say to my self in the mirror just the opposite.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • lmao as an adult I told her ” your rubber I’m glue whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you”

    • I’m rubber your glue

    • as the mom she is suppose to be the glue the role model but she not to me.What ever mean things she says I want them to bounce off of me and stay on her.

    • I always drive slow. only had one speeding ticket in my life was going 45 in a 40

    • one of my long term goals is to be a writer some day. I made a on every college paper written. only red mark was very good metaphor. i love to write.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    January 31, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I am going to bed now. Just going to comment on someone’s status. Was requested that i do. Night.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 1, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • My most sincere apologies Lori!!!  I know I left rather abruptly.  There was actually a national news story that broke, which has some peripheral involvement to me, at my former workplace.  Just in case you have any interested, I’ve posted it on my FB page.  Again, my sincere apology for leaving abruptly.  Hope all is well with you.  Good night.  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • No apology needed. Please take care. I know you can get back to here anytime. I just quit writing because I was sleepy.

    • about my hypomania: it is like the world is spinning too fast to catch up. Anxiety, fear,stress motivate you to try to do the almost impossible. You feel like you will die if you don’t get it accomplished. It is a very hard thing to explain.

    • you talk in word salad, because your thoughts are going to fast for your mouth to speak them

    • if you don’t clear your brain of those thoughts you loose total control of yourself

    • while I was manic i did stress relieve things over and over like take 5 bubble baths a day. exercise pray eat more I don’t know why but I felt like I was going to die like my heart was going to stop. After going to jail while at er my potassium was critical low. only 2.2

    • it was diagnosis as hypokalemia of unknown etiology

    • I ate tons of salt substitute oranges bananas potatoes my potassium came to just 3.5

    • I have always wondered why my potassium was so low?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • it’s like your body will actually start to shut down trying to survive the stress. I believe stress can kill you.

    • I thank God that night that I did go to jail and er and to hospital. I might would of died otherwise.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • the next manic episode happened one year later. I was living in Corsicana, texas as a travel nurse. My son was still at my parents. I would talk to my mom and she would ask me what I said to my son to make him cry. The only thing I would say was that I love you more than anything no matter where we are in the world. Asked him if he needed anything. He told me his shoes were too small. I told him i would send a package in the mail. I was worried that my parents were neglecting my sons needs and emotional abuse. I confided in a friend at work. There advise was to call the abuse hotline. For some weird reason texas won’t investigate arkansas. probably to do with politics and money. anyway i became manic again not sleeping. this time i was delusional and having auditory hallucinations. It was like I was talking directly to God and he was talking back to me. God told me I did not have those parents anymore. That he was my dad now and he would take care of me. That he made me his direct descendant and my dna goes back to adam and eve. That the dna proves who I am. We also talked about Jesus that he was my brother. God has way more children than just Jesus. Jesus was the one that endured so much for everyone. anyways I was basically just in our world. I went outside in a see through shirt with nothing on underneath I was talking to not only God but demons as well. The demons were trying to pull me down. I actually had bruises all up and down my legs. Well I finally went to sleep and had a nightmare about the end of the world. The dream was like a movie and no matter which way it was played backwards or forwards it was the same peace for thousands of years all that needed to happen was my parents be locked up. I woke up from my dream to my mom ringing my doorbell. I would not answer. Then cops came. I opened the door they grabbed me. Threw me on the ground shackled and cuffed me and took me to psychiatric hospital in dallas. You are the only person i have ever told about the hallucinations. anyways I was in hospital for

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • the next manic episode happened one year later. I was living in Corsicana, texas as a travel nurse. My son was still at my parents. I would talk to my mom and she would ask me what I said to my son to make him cry. The only thing I would say was that I love you more than anything no matter where we are in the world. Asked him if he needed anything. He told me his shoes were too small. I told him i would send a package in the mail. I was worried that my parents were neglecting my sons needs and emotional abuse. I confided in a friend at work. There advise was to call the abuse hotline. For some weird reason texas won’t investigate arkansas. probably to do with politics and money. anyway i became manic again not sleeping. this time i was delusional and having auditory hallucinations. It was like I was talking directly to God and he was talking back to me. God told me I did not have those parents anymore. That he was my dad now and he would take care of me. That he made me his direct descendant and my dna goes back to adam and eve. That the dna proves who I am. We also talked about Jesus that he was my brother. God has way more children than just Jesus. Jesus was the one that endured so much for everyone. anyways I was basically just in our world. I went outside in a see through shirt with nothing on underneath I was talking to not only God but demons as well. The demons were trying to pull me down. I actually had bruises all up and down my legs. Well I finally went to sleep and had a nightmare about the end of the world. The dream was like a movie and no matter which way it was played backwards or forwards it was the same peace for thousands of years all that needed to happen was my parents be locked up. I woke up from my dream to my mom ringing my doorbell. I would not answer. Then cops came. I opened the door they grabbed me. Threw me on the ground shackled and cuffed me and took me to psychiatric hospital in dallas. You are the only person i have ever told about the hallucinations. anyways I was in hospital for

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • two weeks. diagnosed as psychotic episode

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Both times in the hospital I was there on Halloween, and election day.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 1, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • My next hospitalization happened about 4 months later this is when I was diagnosed as bipolar. I will let you catch up and tell you more later. If you decide you want to hear more after what I have already said.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Bipolar disorder/hypomania

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • I guess I would like to stay as present focused as possible and concentrate on how you’re feeling in most recent times, what you feel your strongest current needs are, and how you feel those needs could best be met in the future.  To be perfectly honest with you Lori, and this is not meant as a criticism, as I recall asking you for details, but the barrage of details about manic episodes and hypomania, can be a bit disorienting, and feels like it’s diverging away from a productive goal oriented session.  I would like to maximize the help that I can offer you, so what are your current priorities that we can work on?/

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • I guess I would like to stay as present focused as possible and concentrate on how you’re feeling in most recent times, what you feel your strongest current needs are, and how you feel those needs could best be met in the future.  To be perfectly honest with you Lori, and this is not meant as a criticism, as I recall asking you for details, but the barrage of details about manic episodes and hypomania, can be a bit disorienting, and feels like it’s diverging away from a productive goal oriented session.  I would like to maximize the help that I can offer you, so what are your current priorities that we can work on?/

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • 1. Taking positive steps forward to be assertive. Taking criticism and not getting upset. Others perception of me. Feeling confident in my decisions.

    • I tend to always put myself last. Even with things I am good at it seems I lack confidence in myself. Does that even make sense?

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Yes, Lori.  All of that does make complete sense!!  The reason I say that is because when a child is badly abused rather than being nurtured, rather than being loved, assisted in their emotional development, sense of self, having their self esteem enhanced, etc., those are exactly the type of results that take place.  So, is this the basic topic you’d like to pursue at out next meeting?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Yes I would love that. It will help me in all aspects of my life.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, did you prefer to do this today or tomorrow and around what time?  How do things look in terms of your computer’s reception and the weather?  I recall you saying that you won’t be paid again till the middle of the month, so that you wanted to have a big lapse in meetings because of the $18.00 fee.  Would you be able to do a nominal fee of $4.50 for about an hour and a quarter, and that would also provide me with a statistical rating?  Please advice.                                                                                Thanks Doreen

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • how about 6est?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • the nominal fee would be very fair. Your valuable input is priceless.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • That’s very sweet of you to say Lori.  I do appreciate it.  I’m sorry that I’m just seeing your message now.  I could make it tonight between 8PM and 9:15PM EST, if that works for you.  Please advise.  Thanks

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • 8:30pm est

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 6, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • You’d like to begin at 8:30PM EST Lori?  That’s fine with me.  See you then.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 6, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I appologize Mr. Wahrburg.  I had something happen and had to take care of it. Please forgive me for not coming to our appointment.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 7, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Yes, I understand Lori – it’s not a problem.  Would you like to meet this morning?  If so, does 9AM EST work for you?  Take care.

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 7, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • yes

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 7, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I was disconnected again when you were saying now I can sta….. what comes next? I can not get back to reconnect says you are busy

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 7, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • I’m sorry.  I don’t remember Lori.  It seemed like it was a good stopping point.  Do you want to schedule another meeting?  If so what is a good day/time?  Ernie

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 7, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Tuesday all day, thursday after 3, or friday night

    • Tuesday all day, thursday after 3, or friday night

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 7, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok Lori, thanks that was a quick response.  How about Thurs. @ 8:30PM EST?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 7, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Ok

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 7, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Ok, thanks – I’m writing it down.  Can I just ask you if our mtg. today felt helpful to you?

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 7, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • Yes at first i did not think it would until you got to the part about being my own mom. I think this will help a lot. 🙂 My emotions are so sensitive. T

    • his will help tremendously. Thanks.

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 7, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • You’re very welcome.  Great to hear!!  :o)

  • Doreen Van Assen

    February 11, 2010

    Doreen Van Assen

    • I need to reschedule my appointment

  • Ernest Wahrburg

    February 11, 2010

    Ernest Wahrburg

    • Sure, how about either Sat AM, Sun night, say 830 or later, Wed AM or Wed 830PM or later?  Thanks.

    • Oh, Sun. AM is also a possibility.  :o)

Ernest is typing …
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  • Men r so full of sh$t I would say replant & grow a new field of them but then wht good would tht do & people wonder y I would rather stay sleep! #wokeup2bs

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  • Glen Sorensen and 86 others like this.
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    • Julian BrachfeldNever gonna happen… and if I’m going down, I swear I’ll be taking some of “them” with me.

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    • Julian BrachfeldWe are armed… we are not yet fully organized.. nor do we have the set required to do what we must… because we have families that need us and myriad other personal reasons… not to mention the NDAA clauses allowing our runaway government to make us disappear in the night never to be heard from again…

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    • Chris SpratlinThey won’t do it on the up and up. It will be on the sly piece by piece. Europeans cannot own a weapon of any sort even a hunting rifle is a lot of red tape. We are blessed… We are the only country like this…

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  • Victor Davis Hanson says the Obama administration’s release of covert details of the war on terror — what he calls “Securitygate” —  is far more serious than either Watergate or Iran-Contra. Read the article, and let us know if you agree.

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my dauther birthday — Profile Pictures
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MOM This is from 2010-2011 You have my phone numbers for a long time. Just admit you want my work number to cause trouble. Please STOP


 
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    • Fay Schreiner

      November 27, 2010

      Fay Schreiner

      •  

        We missed you on Thanksgiving.  I’ve played with facebook and just click on first thing then another.  Don’t understand all about it yet tho. I’m learning.  I found all your blogs tho.  I was diappointed in some of the things I read.  Some truth but a lot of wrong information.  I’m sorry you feel I’m the cause of all your troubles.  All Ever did was try to be kind and helpful to you.  I ask for your forgiveness of all you think I have said, or done or didn’t do.  I pray for you everyday as well as Nathaniel and Sabrina.  I forgive you for all you have said and done. Mom

    • Doreen Van Assen

      March 25, 2011

      Doreen Van Assen

      •  

        I love you too. I did not go this year to thanksgiving to your home due to last year I went after working the day before 12 hours got off work and drove non stop 6 hours to get there then I had to be back to go to work next day. My kids witness first hand this plus we so poor finacially we were so excited to even be able to come. Well it was told to all of us afterward that you called and said that we just came ate and left. That hurt my children’s feeling very much. I made the decision not to put them through that again so I spent thanksgiving at Carolyn’s. Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful. I love you mom. It is not my place to forgive that is for God to do. I forgave you a long time ago and I even thankyou for all that you do:)

    • Fay Schreiner

      March 26, 2011

      Fay Schreiner

      •  

        I got your message.  I didn’t know why you didn’t stay after dinner and went with your friend and to Carolyn’s for thanksgiving.  I’m glad you came tho.  I pray for all of you everyday.  I didn’t forget Sabrina’s birthday but have no way to send her anything.  No answer on phone or address.  I’m sorry you feel like you do.   I love all of you no matter what you think.  I don’t know what you think I did or didn’t do.  It seems like you feel it’s always someone elses fault for everything.  I ask for your forgiveness again.  I can’t do any more than I have already done.  Come when you can. Love,   Mom

    • Doreen Van Assen

      March 26, 2011

      Doreen Van Assen

      •  

        Yes if and when i can i would love to come. I want to locate a lost friend soon in arkansas. I do not think SABRINA will have a vacation. And nothing you did is your fault or anyone’s fault it just is no way to redo only change. One thing that would be nice would be to warn me ahead of time when your going to move my things have daddy throw me to the ground rape me ignore me lie to me or don’t even care when my baby is about to die have daddy tell me that i am getting on mom’s nerves and must leave slap my daughter lie to the court without me being present saying that I am unemployed taking my son. Throwing away all my things that you think are trash packing up all my things and going through all my things without my permission and taking half of it for your own house grand theft auto. Trying to even steal my own paycheck while in the hospital. Telling me the day after of having a hysterectomy to divorce my husband or move God was with me I physically by myself tore down three beds placed in truck with as much other would fit and gladly moved the day after surgery and had all the beds up and together before bedtime by myself. My husband at the time wanted more things so went back the next day without me.

    • Doreen Van Assen

      March 26, 2011

      Doreen Van Assen

      •  

        Yes if and when i can i would love to come. I want to locate a lost friend soon in arkansas. I do not think SABRINA will have a vacation. And nothing you did is your fault or anyone’s fault it just is no way to redo only change. One thing that would be nice would be to warn me ahead of time when your going to move my things have daddy throw me to the ground rape me ignore me lie to me or don’t even care when my baby is about to die have daddy tell me that i am getting on mom’s nerves and must leave slap my daughter lie to the court without me being present saying that I am unemployed taking my son. Throwing away all my things that you think are trash packing up all my things and going through all my things without my permission and taking half of it for your own house grand theft auto. Trying to even steal my own paycheck while in the hospital. Telling me the day after of having a hysterectomy to divorce my husband or move God was with me I physically by myself tore down three beds placed in truck with as much or say something as rude to me as are you with a nigga? That is just a few for future reference. Also come to my own house screaming to the top of your lungs satan get the behind me is inappropriate behavior unless your a saint and do not think a saint has to scream.

    • Doreen Van Assen

      March 26, 2011

      Doreen Van Assen

      •  

        and I did not go to your house at all thanksgiving. How do you not even remember me not being there at all?

    • Doreen Van Assen

      March 26, 2011

      Doreen Van Assen

      •  

        my phone number in 9037807393, nathaniels phone is9037807392, sabrina’s phone is9037807394 you have had all of those numbers   I have even called you from them before. There no missed calls on my phone or nathaniels phone. I know you have nathaniels phone number

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      Men r so full of sh$t I would say replant & grow a new field of them but then wht good would tht do & people wonder y I would rather stay sleep! #wokeup2bs

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    English Comp I Week 2


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    Apathy is when you do not care what happens in a situation.  I feel this way when I think my opinion does not matter and others will choose one way whether I am for or against, so why bother with discussion?  I would consider this a waste of time and energy when I could be doing other things more enjoyable.  I do admire politicians that speak up for their causes against greater forces like the oil industry, electric companies, big banks, and Wall Street.  Are they for the little people anymore?  The little people are so full of apathy due to justice not seen that no one is for the people anymore.  Politicians in it for what they can get from the big banks, Wall Street, electric companies, oil industries.  It seems like one conglomerate against another not people vs. conglomerate.  Apathy causes voters not to vote, and politicians to ignore their cries.

    The healthcare industry is so high priced now that people are seen as a price tag and not someone’s relative or friend.  The powers in Washington are constantly looking for ways to decrease the payment from Medicare, but not ways to reduce the price of the medications.  You cannot decrease the payment of the Medicare without more sickness happening to the patients because the cost is not going down.  The patient will not be able to afford the treatment, and the employer will not be able to afford to pay workers.  Hospitals and clinics will continue to close up.  Recently a hospital in downtown San Antonio is closing.   The original date in November has now moved up to July.  The workers found out from the newspaper and not the employer that they would be looking for a new job in a month’s time.

    People hurting that are nurses, doctors, and technicians.  These caregivers will probably go on doing their work elsewhere saving lives without caring about the big things like hospital closings, and continued Medicare payments. The healthcare workers care about the patients getting better and their families provided for.  Apathy abounds for the bigger things because they have no control at all what happens.

    Could a politician stand up and tell a pharmaceutical company that your medication can no longer cost $1000 per dose?  This will not work either because the pharmaceutical companies have to pay the cost of research of new drugs. Every drug goes through testing at the Food and Drug Administration, before it is considered safe.   This is very costly and creates increased prices of the medications already considered safe. When the medication is first released as considered safe for use, the drug company has to pay out of pocket to market the drug.  They are taking a chance that it will be a profit in the future.  The reason the drug company has to eat the cost is because Medicare and insurance companies do not pay for a new medication until after it has reached the point of proving that the medication decreases hospital visits decreasing insurance payouts.  This in turn puts a damper on new cures.  This hold up will lead to holding up scientists to continue research.

    The prices are so costly in an economy that is bankrupt that the solution could only become a global matter and no longer a little person matter.  Maybe have the UN decide to back scientist for so many years for a cure.  They decide which country gets the subsidy for the cure.  Then after the cure is found the UN funds the cost of providing the cure.  I am sad to say that my little vote is just a needle in a haystack.  With so many not caring, the world is stagnant and decreasing in healthcare.  We must all come together to end the apathy that is allowing congress to not care for us.


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    This Moment is now on My Desktop



    Busy Lately and now taking time for a MoMENT


    I am currently attending two colleges one for a bachelor’s degree of Nursing and another for a bachelor’s degree of Business Administration. This is my assignment last week in English Comp I discussion.  I love this class more than any class taken in a very long time.  My comments are all that I am posting and not my classmates.  Just this day 20 minutes ago I was carpet shampooing my carpet in the back room and heard a light knock on the door it was my books for next semester in my  Nursing school: five books for my literature class. And one very little book for my professional Nursing class.  I am so blessed; I want to smile until I cry so blessed. The nursing books are what put me to sleep and the literature, well  I want to read non-stop this is so way cool:)

    Here is the assignment last week for Business English Comp I South University on-line, Professor Gabriel Smith.

    Unit 4: Week 4 – W4: Assignment 2 Discussion

    Discussion Question

    Discuss some strategies that Hughes uses to achieve universality. You might, for example, call attention to the story’s impersonal point of view, the lack of descriptive detail about the character’s appearances, and the generality of the information about the characters’ lives.

    Responses

    Expand All Sort by Read/Unread Response Author Date/Time

    Mark as Unread Contrast, scenery, characters Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/4/2012 5:06:10 PM

                In the short story Early Autumn, by Langston Hughes; the author uses imagery and characters in a way to convey emotion without much description of the characters themselves. Langston uses the conversation, and background to influence the readers’ imagination. Upon first reading this fabulous story, the contrast of age, scenery changes during the conversation, and character names themselves give the sense that old age is something we all face sometime in our lives.

    Mary’s age is older than Bill.   Early in the story the thoughts of Bill are that Mary looks old.  Later Hughes writes, “She had been older than he then in Ohio.”(Hughes, para5), to allow readers to clearly see Mary not only looks older; Mary is older than Bill. This attention and contrast to age leads me to think more deep about old age and young age. How in general people or I react whenever seeing an older person.  How I view getting older and old age myself.

    Next, the scenery, contrasting during what is happing during the story; continues leading my thoughts towards old age vs. young age.  During the sentences,” It was late afternoon. Nearly sunset. Cold.” (Hughes, para4) Hughes wrote this in the dead middle of the story.  This is the exact time in the story that Bill is facing Mary directly and asking a few personal questions. This scene has me thinking by using scenery that Bill thinks old age is approaching closer to him about to reach out.  Then the conversation gets a little more personable and an almost invite pursues.  He tells her she is welcome to visit.  At this very moment, the scene changes more Hughes writes,” The leaves fell slowly from the trees in the Square. Fell without wind. Autumn dusk. She felt a little sick.”(Hughes, para8) The closer Bill (young age) gets to Mary (old age) the scene is aging also.  After the leaves falling without wind, the bright lights come on suddenly, Hughes writes,”… chains of misty brilliance in the blue air.”(Hughes, para10) at the same time Mary (old age) is leaving. This scenery change gives the feeling that Bill (young age) is happy to see (Mary) old age leave.          Not only does the scene have me thinking about old age vs. young age; the characters themselves Hughes brilliantly creates in my mind’s eye an older women that is struggling with everything inside her to stay young and a younger man that wants to like old age but not let it encompass himself.  Mary seems bitter and looks older to Bill.  Mary caused Bill to become bitter toward women.  The meaning of Mary is bitter.  Mary works at a Bursars office, so I assumedly think Mary likes to be around youth. She has three children. She names her youngest son after Bill (young age). She is desperately trying to hang on to her youth.  Hughes writes, “Bill was still young.”(Hughes Para 5). Bill (young age) means will, helmet protector.  Bill is protecting himself from Mary, bitter, (old age).  He is a lawyer “way downtown” (Hughes para3).  This makes me think that Bill (young age) can almost legally protect himself from Mary (old age). Bill’s wife’s name is Lucille. The meaning of Lucille is bright light. To me this name and along with the scenery changing to brilliance upon Mary (old age) leaving leads me to think Bill (young age) wants to stay youthful and a safe distance from Mary (old age).             The use of contrast of age, scenery and names of characters lets the reader face old age and think about getting older.  Do I want to grow old gracefully or rush into it?  Am I comfortable with aging?  My mind will probably sleep on this one for a while. Hughes is a brilliant author and this seems like to me part of a movie script almost pure genius.

    Mark as Unread RE: Contrast, scenery, characters Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/4/2012 6:08:23 PM
    Hughes achieves universality in that he does not physically describe the characters.  We know them by what the other thinks of them, dialogue and scenery.  It lets the reader decide to each of us what they look like.  Hughes only gives facts through dialogue. 1. Mary looks old, 2. Bill looks young, 3. Mary is older, 4. Bill is younger, 5. Mary works at a college, 6. Bill works at a law firm, 7. Bill has 2 children, 8. Mary has 3 children, 9. Mary’s youngest child’s name is Bill, 10. Bill’s wife’s name is Lucille .
    This is written to a universal audience pure brilliance:)
    This is so cool; because with my own writing, I feel sometimes only people not from my country are the only ones that understand me. I would love to be able to write universal and everyone understand something from the writing. Or at the very least ask a question.

    Mark as Unread RE: W4A2:Discussion Question Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/5/2012 8:32:46 AM
    Very good Thelma 🙂 you make these points very clear to me thankyou.

    Mark as Unread RE: W4A2:Discussion Question Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/5/2012 8:34:28 AM
    This story somehow has me think about the past in the way of relationships if I have any regrets meeting or not seeing someone ever again. I think I am ok with my life as it is 🙂

    Mark as Unread RE: Contrast, scenery, characters Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/5/2012 11:23:45 AM
    yes I love literature:) I have glance already at the other two. And one brings to mind embaressment and the other shock. I love reading both of these out loud is very fun. Reading silently you do not get the whole effect of the stories amazing indeed. How they do it????

    Mark as Unread RE: Wk 4 A2 Discussion “Early Autumn Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 12:50:11 AM
    Patricia,
    Through your perspective of this encounter I can see the childlike veiws of love.  That people search constantly everyday wondering what brings us together and it is the moment we are in.  What creates static is distance, time and looking to the past with regret. We forget about ourselves completely and focus on the one person not ever letting go completely. Continuing on in this pattern can create bitterness, resentment, aging, getting older and older. To stay youthful look at the present and be happy, let go of the past with no regrets. Now I am young and have no regrets of anything I can just play all day and have some fun happy with life and everything around me, I love myself, my life, my career, everything about me.  I have no regrets. Everyone and anyone and every situation I have encountered from the moment I was alive until now is my past up until this very moment. I have no regrets for I clearly love myself :)))))I am forever young for I have no regrets. I love, I love, I love.
    Very good Patricia:)

    Mark as Unread RE: Wk 4 A2 Discussion “Early Autumn Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 12:57:47 AM
    The hustle and bustle of everday life can cause the rift to start creating the static. When you ever feel a shock of static electricity stop for a second and look at what is happening.  Have fun and smile it is only the moment you are at that is frustrating not the future or the past just that moment. Shock now you are young again. The future and past just collided and bam its electric shock, just happy to be alive and who you are at that moment. 🙂

    Mark as Unread RE: Wk 4 A2 Discussion “Early Autumn Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 1:26:25 AM
    Bam electric shock I don’t want to come down I want to stay here forever young, no distance anywhere just the moment if it gets away searching can I find it or is everyone too busy? Sewing, cooking, doing their favoite things happy they are alive and ignoring me, no one wants to play with me, no one wants to teach me, no one wants to sing with me, no one wants to dance with me, no fun so I just sing on my own, dance on my own older , older here I come no regrets though this is kinda cool I am happy just being me, open the car door and BAM electric shock, in the moment the future and the past ………………etc……

    Mark as Unread RE: Wk 4 A2 Discussion “Early Autumn Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 1:39:14 AM
    I am older loving life this is fresh all new to me. I love myself because everything until this moment is me and I would not be here without it. BAM electric shock now I am singing happy birthday to my patient who turned older today or is she forever young????? Bam electric shock I sing with my co-workers on this busy day that was held up from the start with five machines down and going on overdrive.  BAM electric shock its not just one patient but two patients’ birthday today:)

    Mark as Unread RE: Wk 4 A2 Discussion “Early Autumn Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 2:08:22 AM
    She’s forever young shes smiling on a machine, loving life this moment everthing she is from the past, I don’t question the love it’s there all around me in the air, if I get too busy BAM electric shock the future and the past meet at that moment all at once pure happiness that can not escape. NO arguing no fighting happy at this moment no questioning it’s love in the moment no regrets no questions I am here at this moment 🙂

    Mark as Unread RE: W4: Assignment 2 Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 2:40:07 AM
    Yes Lori,
    I think that she left happy becoming bitter and aging clinging to the past not letting go to move on.  He was left bitter during the relationship now happy. It lets me see the circle and now that Mary said goodbye to Bill again in such a short meeting I can hope that she can now let go and not stay bitter anymore happier with herself.
    Anyways I always love the happy ending:) I tell my son that is the best because so many in real life will go to war to find a happy ending it is that much of a desire you struggle and fight to find the happy ending.   I tell him never get bored of happy endings that is what everyone searches for:)
    The way Hughes wrote this universal is that you can envision the future and the past however you want; he left out much detail.  This is so cool:) In the middle can represent middle age also. Where the young and the old collide.

    Mark as Unread RE: W4: Assignment 2 Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 8:45:05 PM
    Sometimes I handle it not so good but I know it is just for that moment but I try so hard; sometimes its just not fair at all. But in the end if your truthful and loving and your deepest desire is love you will not be bitter. I give it to a higher power than me; because I can’t do anything at all by myself.  I am just a little girl in a big big world. Then I just stand up lol all the bible says thats left. When you have done all that you can STAND.

    Mark as Unread RE: week4 assigment2 Lori Schreiner Email this Author 6/6/2012 8:56:22 PM
    Terrie,
    I have the same problem of the sleep when I read anything with learning something new. If it is something that I know the meaning while I read I love it and read fastly and can’t put it down. Text books I can’t read unless I am really really really wanting to and drink caffein and force myself awake and think about it as I have to read this no matter what. I find that the more I read the more that it is easier because now I know and it is easier.  So breaking all the vocabulary down the first time through looking up meanings of what I don’t know helps in the future very much.  My health as well:)


    English Comp I W2A3


                                                                                 

     

    Paying Bills On­-line

    By Lori Schreiner

    English Composition I

    South University On-line

    May 30, 2012


     

                Going to college, work, and my son’s schedule keep me very busy.  My days are so full that I do not have time to get to the post office before it closes.   At times,  bills are due before knowing.  I always have the internet at my fingertips no matter where I am.  The mobile phone has 4G unlimited access.  Technology has made life easier to plan and pay bills on time that will not get overlooked.  Paying bills on-line saves time, money, and natural resources.

    Before having internet access, I physically went to a payment center within a certain time frame.  With the schedule so busy, time runs out for simply paying bills.  I would get off work at 8pm when no site is open.  This has inconvenienced me to the point of my electricity being turned off.  I went home to a daughter devastated.  No way for her to get ready for school the next morning. Her natural curls would never straighten without electricity to heat up the iron.  We left our inconvenienced home and checked into the Holiday Inn.  While no electricity was at home, we were enjoying the comfort of an indoor pool, cable television, and other amenities of the hotel.  The  extra money spent paying for the hotel room is avoidable paying bills on-line.

    The internet makes the days of paying bills easier by allowing time for relaxation.  Paying bills no longer requires showering, dressing, and applying make-up.  Simply wake-up and type www.cpsenergy.com .  The energy bill paid from the comfort of the bed in pajamas is on time.  The website shows the current bill due, due date, and past amounts paid.  Without internet, driving to a location center through traffic after work becomes a dreaded ritual;  the payment center’s operating hours remain closed before work.  It would be more convenient before work due to less traffic.    Hitting 5 o’clock rush hour traffic, driving extra miles to reach the payment center; the traffic slows down to a crawl on the interstate.  When reaching the scene, it looks  as though everyone must pay at the same time.  The line stretches all the way to the door.   A long wait in line taking more time away from other important things such as homework, sleep, and dinner is frustrating to anyone.   Waiting in a line is not very convenient.

    Paying on-line not only saves time, it also reduces money spent.  Gas is so expensive that being at home saves 5 dollars of gasoline to drive to a location center.  Not only is money saved on the expense to get there; envelopes, stamps, or money orders are no longer purchased.  By using the debit card over the internet, checks are not even an issue.  The cost of the supplier for the product is also reduced.  They can decrease employees and cut out the price of mailing bills.  These things help to keep the cost of the product affordable to everyone.

    Another benefit of paying bills on-line is the saving of natural resources.     No longer receiving  bills by snail-mail decreases paper use.   A notice sent through e-mail politely states the next due date.  By paying direct from my fingertips on the computer, all paper decreases in the process. Checks are not needed.  The receipt is on the computer.   Storing the receipt in a file on the computer is simply accomplished in a few clicks.  Trees needed to make paper for these documents are now saved.

    Technology has made my life simpler.  I now have time to relax doing other things.  Paying bills on-line gives me freedom to use my time for school, work, or sleep.  I no longer have a headache trying to get off in time to get to a payment center before it closes only to get into a traffic jam and miss the cut off time.  I save gas, money, and trees.  I will definitely continue to pay bills on-line.